Speaking of prayer, I'm praying for you. I've never been a Catholic, but from what I've heard and seen from those that are, or have put catholicism aside, a relationship with Jesus is not tops on the list. It's all about ritual. Yes, we make the messes in our lives, but God is the one who helps us to clean them up. In our power we often make things worse. I can't imagine what a mess I'd be if I hadn't embraced a relationship with Christ. I don't like religion. When people ask what religion I am I tell them I'm a Christian who loves Jesus. I'm praying that you find that too. Trust me, on your own you are bound to mess things up. We all do. It's human nature. I pray about everything. I even pray to have a good hair day. When you talk to God all the time your prayers turn into conversations. It's a beautiful thing. Thanks for sharing your heart.