My friend, you are a classic enabler. I should know, I wrote a book on the subject. I enabled my son for years and I didn't do him any favors. His life is still a mess because of his lack of follow through and woe is me attitude. I enabled my alcoholic husband for decades, and my wakeup call came from his request for a divorce. Since he was drinking like a fish while I worked like a dog, it was quite a shock. Thankfully, I turned back to God and He saved my husbands life and our marriage. Saying no and setting boundaries is SO important. you have nothing to feel guilty about, unless you continue to enable your relative. You are doing them a favor by not helping them. People will never stand on their own two feet if we continue to hold them up. Thank you for sharing your heart. ❤️